There are certain things that are unattainable no matter how hard you try to get hold of them…There are certain things that just cannot be fixed even if you put your life to fix them! It is difficult to get back people who have meant a lot to you but it is even more difficult to handle the fact that you are not the same for them anymore in spite all your efforts!!! Certain things are just meant to be the way they are, one can call it fate or destiny.. Few things are short lived. But I always believed that the bond I shared with him was not for a short period of time..  After that night (refer ‘the letter’) we started talking almost everyday 🙂 I remained skeptical about things though and did not want to repeat the same mistakes all over again.. So I was prudent every time I spoke to him. Initially, it was difficult to be myself as I did not open up about things but later, my mind and heart spoke a thousand words to him without any hesitation. He always listened to me with a curious ear. He seemed to be a little interested about the on goings in my life, while on the contrary I was too keen to know about everything in his life, his whereabouts, his set of friends, his problems, family, even his intake of food 😛 😛 The entire phase seemed absurdly cute and I loved every minute of it. Our mode of conversation was mostly through texts. My fingers were never in peace and the message traffic remained green 24*7. During this time, my parents were mostly cooperative but as soon as my perpetual typing of the texts paced, they lost their patience . Their fuming stare day and night was like a thousand bullets eagerly propelling through their angry eye balls towards me.With every beep of my message tone, my parents exasperation slowly reached the zenith. I had no other choice but to cease for the moment or  confront the ineluctable repercussions 😀 😀 😀

He always told me that I was the indisputable ‘antaryami’ (who knew everything, of course all pun intended). I always claimed that I knew everything. If nothing I was pretty certain about what and how he felt about me as a person. I claimed that I was aware of my importance in his life (the journey from maximum to meagre importance – completely heartbreaking and excruciating! 😦 😦 ). He was not vocal about how he felt about me but he always did indicate that what I saw or felt might not be for real! 🙂 🙂 He often called me by that name but his indication helped me believe (virtually) that I might not be just an ordinary friend but a special friend  (I so badly wished that my illusion was a  reality) 😦 😦

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